Me and Bitches Love Me (yeah that's his name) got into beef today. 

I was hooking my afternoon meal up, getting ready for "The Young And The
Restless" when the nigga tripped out on me. I was warming up a Cup of Noodles when Bitches Love Me approached me bugging out. His beef? He said that he had his food on top of the microwave and that his shit was next to go in. I told him his shit was sitting there for damn near hour. (actually it was more like 30 minutes, but come on on!) Bitches Love Me started talking real loud, "Bitch ass New York niggas. Ya'll ain't running shit around here." By now a small crowd of about 7-8 mother fuckers start playing looky-loo. I already have a fat man complex and in my mind I'm thinking, "this nigga trying to test me." If I let this bull shit slide every mother fucker and their step child is gonna try to test me too. Time to nip this shit n the bud. "Fuck you nigga!" "You ain't gonna bust a grape!" That's all I said. Bitches Love Me, replies... "Aw'ight nigga." That's it... "aw'ight nigga." But the way he said it... it was like, "watch your back, mother fucker!" I get my Cup of Noodles and my can of tuna and bounced to the "TV room". All the while I'm watching, The Young And The Restless I keep thinking about what this nigga, Bitches Love Me said and the words are eating at me. I've got to do something. I walk out of the "TV room" downstairs to the flats and there is Bitches Love Me, posted at the TV watching music videos. He's sitting less than 5 feet away from my cell when it hits me.... "What would Napoleon Bonaparte do?" I think Napoleon would strike first and let the cards fall where they may. I walked into my cell, grabbed my big coffee cup and filled it with baby oil. I took the cup to the microwave placed it inside and set it for 11 Minutes. When the timer went off I called to C-Rat who was sitting next to Bitches Love Me. When he came over I told him that Red and Ant were watching a bikini contest in the TV room. C-Rat took off at light speed. I saw officer Brown on the third tier frisking an inmate. As she entered the cell to perform her shakedown  I walked up to Bitches Love Me and
didn't hesitate. As soon as the oil hit the side of his face he let out a scream that I will never forget. I could actually see the flesh melting from his face. Some of the oil must have went inside his ear because he slapped at his ear several times before slipping on the oil puddle. That's when I started stomping him. I stomped him until Doc grabbed me and said, "that's enough! "Don't kill'em youngster, you don't want to kill'em!" We've been locked down ever since. It's just a matter of time before the guards come get me. I feel terrible for what this place has made, but I have to survive. I'm coming home in one piece no matter what.


  1. Best wishes, from a random blogger. I hope they don't increase your sentence, and that things work out as well as they can.

  2. AnonymousJune 21, 2013

    That was a bad act